Living Apostolic in San Antonio

The Official Blog of Alamo City Apostolic Church

The Other Silent Killer

Cancer is a terrifying disease.

I don’t say that simply as one who repeats information overheard from others. Three of my grandparents died of cancer. My mother died of cancer. My father is a cancer survivor, as is one of my brothers.

One of the scariest things about cancer is its ability to exist undetected below the surface, often spreading silently throughout the human body before it is ever discovered. Once it has done that, tracking down and eradicating every trace of it can be overwhelming. And if a trace is missed, given enough time it will no doubt resurface.

Cancer has earned its title of “silent killer.”

But there is another silent killer. Instead of attacking us at a physical level, however, this killer wreaks its havoc at the emotional and spiritual level, and its victims litter the landscape of the past. Its name? Unforgiveness.

Just as some individuals are genetically predisposed to cancer, so some are emotionally more vulnerable than others to hurts and misunderstandings. Offenses that other people can shake off cling to them, haunting their thoughts and draining them of life and vitality.

If unforgiveness is not recognized and treated for what it is, it has a 100% spiritual and emotional mortality rate.

Unforgiveness destroys friendships, wrecks relationships and opens the door to opportunistic infections such as bitterness, loneliness and depression. No matter who was at fault in the offense, all become victims when unforgiveness comes into play.

Cancer must be dealt with – swiftly, decisively and aggressively. Every day that a cancer goes untreated tilts the odds more and more against the victim. Unforgiveness is no different.

Steps to beating the other silent killer:

  1. Ask yourself, “Is this hurt worth dying over?” If it’s not, then don’t let it kill you. Take control.
  2. Don’t wait for the other party to apologize. Even if you are convinced you are right, be the first one to seek reconciliation. In the end, it’s not about proving who is right and who is wrong. You have made a decision: the relationship is more valuable than the offense. Apologize for the estrangement and let the other person know you’re no longer interested in who harmed whom.
  3. Let it go. Once apologies have been exchanged, incinerate the offense. Don’t keep it in storage to be brought back out in a future disagreement. Dredging up old offenses demonstrates that forgiveness never really happened.
  4. Seek to build positive bridges. You and the other party will never agree on everything, but there are bound to be areas you do agree on. Find those and focus on them.

Will these steps fix every situation? No. It takes two to reconcile, and you cannot control the other person’s decisions. But if they are not willing to forgive, at least you have eradicated the cancer from your own system. Don’t let them put it back in you – move on.

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

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May 1, 2015 - Posted by | Inspirational | , , , ,

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